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Wednesday, March 29, 2006

And now the news.

Meteorologists are like psychics. It's a scam. Yesterday they predicted that it would be in the fifties and thunderstorm. They also predicted it for today. Both days it was in the thirties and it did not rain. There I was in my bermuda shorts and snorkel with my reenforced aluminum umbrella (with rubber handle) and I was freezing and sweating all at the same time. If you went to a psychic and they said tomorrow will be a banner day for relationships for you but instead the next day your cousin died, it would be the exact same thing. So I think what should happen: All meteorologists should work a short stint with the psychic friends network so that they can at least make it sound that they might have been right about the weather even though they had no idea what they were talking about.
"No, I didn't say it was going to rain. What I said was that something with the letter 'r' or 'a' in it might happen. But I also told you to be really open to the possibilities of any type of weather. There's an 'r' and an 'a' in 'generally sunny'. See."
And psychics should be forced to predict with balls. Don't be vague.
"Tomorrow you will have emotional turmoil in the morning leading to job loss in the afternoon followed by sporadic drinking in the evening."

Good night.

Tuesday, March 28, 2006

All cured.

You ever have a friend try to show you something really cool like a song he can play on the piano or a magic trick or a yo-yo trick but instead of ever accomplishing the feat that friend just keeps going, "No, wait. Hang on. Okay. No. Wait. Wait. Hang on. No. Wait." etc.?
Well, perhaps some of you will think that that's what I'm doing. Every so often on the blog I've made people believe that I was doing alright when I was drowning in obsessive thoughts. (Or at least I tried to make people believe I was fine.) Well, I want to tell everyone that I really believe about 95 per cent that I'm actually doing better now. I think they finally got me on the right medicines to where I haven't shed a tear in a week (a record for recent months) or felt overly anxious. I still have a few obsessive thoughts sneak in there but I've also got good friends, blog readers, wife and family to help me out. And I think I'm finally at the stage where all I'll really need to get past the anxious moments is any one of those people to talk to when I get that way.
Now some of you may not even be reading this so never mind.

Now some of you may be checking in after a long absence from this blog because it was getting too depressing. Sorry. It'll get happier now. Look happy clown clouds made of poodle fur of sugar!

Probably more frequent blogging too.

Probably.

Bye.